Where did fifty one go?

Fifty Two is close.

Where did fifty one go?

My friend is a personal trainer.  Not my personal trainer, just a friend that I train with.

That is until a few weeks ago, when I signed up for her twelve week challenge.

Last week was week one of the twelve weeks challenge.

Week one was a different kind of week.  Normally I don’t do a lot of traveling with my job. Most nights I am at my home, and the next morning I wake up in my own bed.    From there it’s really easy to get up early and make it to the gym that is only 5 minutes away from my home.   From there it’s easy to eat healthy because I have planned.

Last week I traveled from my home to the East Coast of Savannah Georgia for a three day meeting.  After a five hour drive back home, I jumped on a plane the next morning for a three day meeting on the West Coast in Seattle Washington.

Three hour time zone difference only added to the confusion.

My internal time clock was so out of balance, all day meetings, and late night dinners, and sleeping in strange places at different hours created a sense of havoc.

I had my running shoes and shorts for the gym, but I never made it to the gym or outside not a single time.  I brought them home smelling the same way they were when I left, clean.

Most of my focus on this Week 1 challenge was mental.  I thought about the challenge and made good choices on food and I thought about the things I would work on when I got home.

I know one thing for sure, if my job included constant travel I would have to make some big adjustments to my training.   I didn’t choose the restaurants, but I did get choices on selections.  Seattle is much more health conscious when it comes to menus compared to Georgia, at the least the places that are close to me.

I am ready for week two, but know that I am a little behind from the others that put their hearts into week one.

I also know that this fact will drive me to work hard this week to catch up.

This challenge is not about weight loss.  It’s about making changes that are going to take me way beyond fifty two.  It’s about creating abundant energy and a mind that’s clear.  It’s about skin that glows.  It’s about finishing something that I started.  It’s about focusing on my sleep habits.  It’s about changes for the better and changes for the future.

The quick picture I snapped of my bag reminds me of what another personal trainer told me at some point.   Think of it like you are going on a trip, exercise and healthy eating habits are what you are packing.  What are you going to take with you?

Twelve weeks from now I will be taking along some different things!   I am ready for the challenge!


To my daughter

To my daughter on her 15th birthday. 15 random things that I love about having you as my daughter.
1. I love that you stole Valentines Day from me, but I received the best gift ever. You.
2. I love that you still want me to hold you and rock you. I just can’t hold you while standing despite the fact that you believe that I can.
3. I love your loud random outbursts. Your father is thankful that I am mostly past this behavior.
4. I love your dreams and I love that they are big. I know you want to leave Cornelia for a big city because there is nothing to eat and nothing to do, but I promise you one day you will long to come back. I will be happy to see you when you do.
5. I love that you eat our groceries on the way home from the grocery store. Mainly because I love to do that too.
6. I love that you update my phone and teach me to use it for more than just talking. Yes I am glad that you did not talk me into flappy bird.
7. I love that you name our pets but never call them that name. It’s always another term of endearment.
8. I love your sense of direction. I need you as my co-pilot because I have none.
9. I love that you love me despite the fact that you are the only person I have ever yelled at in my life.
10. I love that you are a grazer. Maybe it is healthier to never eat your entire meal at one seating.
11. I love how you love shoes. I hope you never break your ankle wearing high heels.
12. I love to take you shopping when it’s my turn. You are brutally honest.
13. I love that you are a swimmer.
14. I love our favorite story. The time that I stuck my tongue out and licked your face when you were having a meltdown. The meltdown stopped. I told friends and they tried this technique.
15. I love that you are mine. Forever.

I love being a mom at 50.  Working on staying young by thinking young.    It is what is it and fifty is 50!



Mom he sent me a facebook message and said message me.   Mom he handed me his phone number and said text me.  

Well did you?

No, I am too scared.

Good, because I am scared too.  

You are a freshmen and he is a senior.  Trust me be scared.   

How do you know?  I just know. 

Then I reminded myself we have a long way to go!



Eighty Seven

She is eighty seven today.

I took her a present and I took my computer.  It is her birthday and yet I wanted something for myself.

I opened up a blank document and asked her to tell me some stories.

I want to write them down for later, I’ll need to tell them to someone one day.

Tell me stories about birthdays, stories about Christmas, stories about babies, funny stories, happy stories, real life stories.

It was a slow start to my project when I said let’s start with birthdays , and  she said she didn’t really remember birthdays.

I pushed her along with surely you can remember one birthday there have been eighty seven!  With a twinkle and a smile she started talking.

We moved on to Christmas and the words got easier.

I typed as fast as I could.

I would slow down mesmerized by the words, then  I would speed up almost holding my breath trying to get it all down.

I’ll work on my notes soon, correcting the spelling and the punctuation and the run on sentences.

I’ll tuck them away and keep adding to them and one day when someone asks I will tell them the stories.

Some of the stories are in my heart and I don’t need to write them down.

Surely I won’t forget!

She was somewhere around fifty, my age,  the day I drifted into her life.

I took something that belonged to her.

She loved me anyway.


These three words will be removed from my vocabulary going forward.

Busy, tired, and unfortunately are the chosen words.

Three easy words that are easy to spell and easy to say.  Maybe too easy to say!

I am not too busy for you. I can stop what I am doing and look you in the eyes and talk to you.

I recognize your importance and I am not too busy for you.

I am not so important that busy becomes an excuse.

I am not busy because I am lazy and it is easier to pretend that I am busy.

I am not unorganized to the extent that busy is brought on by my lack of organization.

Most of my tired is brought on by me.

I choose tired when I run at the end of  a long day.

My tired is temporary.

I will choose wisely when it comes to activities that deplete my energy and bring on tired.

I have one job instead of three to help take care of my family, I don’t know this kind of tired.

I have a warm house and a cozy bed to sooth my kind of tired.

I have a healthy family that does not require attention in the night to keep me constantly tired.

I will try to recognize true “tired” when I see it and will try to help someone that needs a rest.

I never thought of unfortunately as an unacceptable word until a dear friend told me they will not allow their employees to say this word to a customer.

Listen to a sentence in which you say unfortunately and find a better word to replace it with.

Turn unfortunately into… I can offer these options.

Don’t let unfortunately be the easy way out.

Unfortunately we don’t offer that product?  This question could be modified to,   We don’t sell that product but I know someone that can help you.  Let me give you a phone number and an email address.

Do I have a list of resources and references ready so I don’t feel compelled to say unfortunately?

Unfortunately I cannot go.    What if it were changed to … I can go another day, what works with your schedule.

Busy, Tired, and Unfortunately gone gone gone!


He called him dude, and he asked him a question and said hey man.

He was talking to my father.  My father is 80.

It struck me as an odd way to address a soft spoken well mannered man like my father.    It also struck me as odd that my father seemed to like the conversation.

I guess he respected my father and I guess that my father respected him.  They were strangers until this conversation.

Maybe my father didn’t feel 80 when the young man addressed him as dude.

I really didn’t understand, but it did make me smile.

Sweet Exhaustion

Silently we rode in the back seat of the car.  She snuggled up against me and laid her head on my shoulder.

Exhausted from two hours of swim practice, exhausted and still knowing there was a test to be studied for tonight.  Knowing that we should be home under the covers studying.

I twisted her hair just like she twisted mine when I rocked her to sleep years ago.

I kissed her sweet face just like I had a million times.

Funny that she let me.

Fourteen does not allow this opportunity very often.

Knowing that I am loved and that she still needs me when she is exhausted and nothing can make the world right except her mom was delightful.

I could not take the tired away and I could not take the test for her but I can love her better than anyone, at least for today.

One day she will believe that someone else can love her better, but I’ll know the truth.

And that truth is that no one can love her more than I.


I stopped to ask if I could help.   After a few questions, I knew I could not leave her on the side of the road.  Can I call someone for you?  And she replied there is no one,  I am an outcast.   How do you even know that sad word at the age of fourteen?

A few days passed and a coach reached out to me and said please ask your daughter talk to the young lady on the team bus that sits alone and talks to no one.

Two reminders in a week.  Have I been oblivious to lonely?


Yesterday I ran up a mountain.

But more importantly I ran up a mountain with friends. No matter what you do in life, it is always better with a group of friends!  Yes life is better when you have a group to belong to, a group to share exciting news and accomplishments with, a group to lean on when times are tough, a group to learn with, and a group that motivates and encourages you to be the best that you can be!

I went back and read my race report from 2011, the first year that I ran The Currahee Challenge.  These were the words that I recorded, “The early morning drive to Toccoa had a beautiful sky with a few strands of clouds surrounded by some beautiful pink colors. As I stopped at the traffic light at Jeanette Jamerson intersection, there Currahee Mountain stood and was perfectly centered. I had been reading about the history of Currahee Mountain and the meaning that the Cherokee Indians had given to Currahee “Stand Alone” was perfectly clear. The 506th Infantry Regiment, a unit of the 101st Airborne Division adopted this as their motto, “We Stand Alone Together”. What an awesome day for a race with this beautiful sun coming up and the crisp fall air. I couldn’t help but think on this. Yes each of the runners would be alone in their quest to complete the course, but together with friends.”

Currahee Mountain challenges me greatly each year!  When the race results were shared, I listened to the awards and they started with the age group of seventy.  Here I stand at fifty, and hoping my name is being called at seventy!  I sure hope some of the friends that I stood with yesterday are still standing with me in twenty years!  I will continue to do my part to keep this group intact!  Hence another goal for fifty is 50!  Be a friend and be a part of a group.  Now this will keep me going!